Gay moms and dads please sign up

10 04 2008

By Nqobile Shoba

I must admit I hadn’t really thought much about this topic until I had a very interesting conversation with a close gay friend of mine. Sitting and chatting we came across the topic of gay adoption. I was interested to hear from him that he didn’t believe in gay adoption, and did not want children of his own. NO CHILDREN!! I was shocked?! Then I realised that he may just have a point.

We all know that the idea of gay marriage has been a hotly contested over the recent years. Statistics from a study published in the January 1996 issue of Developmental Psychology found that children raised by a homosexual parent were much more likely to experiment with homosexual behavior themselves. The question one should then ask is , is there anything wrong with imitating your gay parents? If we are a society that has in fact accepted the idea of homosexual relationships and homosexuality then why not let gay men or couples adopt children? I mean lets look at the facts . There are thousands if not hundreds of thousands of children in South Africa alone, that need loving homes. It wouldn’t be so bad if all of them could at least be taken in by loving parents who could provide them with food, shelter, clothes, education… the essentials in life. If that couple happens to be gay, then what? Keep the child in a foster home for its whole childhood life in the hopes that someday it will find loving parents in a heterosexual couple’s home? I mean lets be realistic, what are the chances that a couple that is fully able to conceive is going to want to adopt a child? 

However If a gay man is willing to admit that he does not believe in a child being raised by gay parents then could we not then say in some respect the idea of a gay couple raising a child is not normal at all? Im not saying all gay people or couples agree with that statement, but you have to admit it makes you think doesn’t it? What I’m trying to ask is do you think its normal for gay couples to raise children?

Let me know what you think…




19 responses

11 04 2008

Awesome that you raised this question Bile! This is such an important and complex issue which we all definitely need to explore especially considering the development of and growing trends in society.

The fact of the matter is that although people have become more tolerant of each other in general, we have nowhere near reached a stage where we can shape our own identities and live out our personal choices without being judged or persecuted by others. Why does your gay friend not want children of his own? Either he just isn’t keen which is fair enough, or he is skeptical of how a child of his would be received by the community having been raised by two men.

I can’t wait for the day when people realise that discrimination is just the dumbest most unhelpful concept ever. In a country where stable and secure family setups are few and far between I don’t think it’s right to deny any two people who love each other and are fully able to care for a child the right to do so. Its ludacris to assume that a child would be better off in a foster home, orphanage or any kind of public institution, as opposed to an environment where he or she will receive individual attention.

And about the “children raised by a homosexual parent were much more likely to experiment with homosexual behavior themselves” thing – that’s stupid – pretty much every single homosexual person I know was raised by heterosexual parents. Furthermore, we should be aiming towards a society in which the fact that a child might be more likely to end up gay is no big deal.

So ya, I think it is normal – well maybe not is, but it should be.

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30 07 2008
Kenny Roberts

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30 07 2008
Kenny Roberts

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6 10 2008

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6 10 2008

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7 10 2008
cock gobblers
15 10 2008

gay people should be able to have kids, who cares if the kids turn out gay, it’s not a bad thing to be gay and people need too stop seeing it as a bad thing/

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18 08 2009
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2 09 2009
mike zureich

hi my name is mike and i am gay

2 09 2009
16 10 2009
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5 09 2010

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29 11 2010

Thank you for this, appriciated!
תיירות גאה

29 11 2010

Thank you for this, appriciated!
תיירות גאה

18 02 2012
10 Most Rare and Strange Phobias « TOP 10s of The Worlds

[…] Can you imagine anyone being scared of the beauty? Yes, there are many people who fear beautiful women, this is called caligynephobia. This can be found in adolescent children and men who might not have straight orientation. [Image Source] […]

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